It’s 5 solutions to 5 questions. Right here we go…

1. Bushy legs at work

Lately my work began permitting workers to put on shorts. And inside the previous couple of years, I, a 30-something girl, have stopped feeling the necessity to shave my legs. Which I’m wonderful with in my on a regular basis life, however nonetheless really feel reticent about whereas at work. So, I’ve but to put on something that might naked my legs to the workplace. But it surely acquired me questioning if the skilled norms for girls are altering. We’ve seen a properly wanted lean in the direction of gender-neutral costume codes. Do you assume that might enable for it to be extra culturally acceptable for girls to have noticeably furry legs within the workplace?

Sure, it’s turning into extra culturally acceptable, though it’s nonetheless within the course of of fixing relatively than one thing that has absolutely modified.

There are nonetheless loads of people who find themselves squicked out by feminine physique hair and who will assume furry feminine legs are unprofessional-looking. There are individuals who will discover, be a bit stunned, after which transfer on with out pondering a lot about it once more … and there are individuals who will endlessly consider you as the girl who doesn’t shave her legs (and dares to reveal them). You’ve acquired to resolve in the event you’re okay with that or not.

The tradition of your workplace issues too. It’s extra more likely to be A Factor in additional conservatives fields or areas, or fields that put a excessive worth on gender-norm-conforming appearances.

2. My workplace despatched me a random TV

I work remotely and have by no means been into my workplace. Just a few weeks after I used to be employed, and properly after I acquired my common workplace gear, I used to be additionally despatched a 72-inch TV. There is no such thing as a motive for me to make use of this in the middle of my work, and I imagine it was seemingly despatched in error. I have no idea if any of my coworkers additionally acquired one, as we by no means focus on non-work issues.

I’ve by no means used this TV, as I’ve no area for it on my desk (who would?), however I’ve not despatched it again as I’m unable to move it to the publish workplace, on condition that I journey completely by bicycle, and acquired it on the top of lockdown when I didn’t really feel snug assembly somebody to take me to mail it again. In truth, I’ve not talked about the receipt of the TV to anybody. Presently, it’s sitting in its field below my loveseat.

The issue comes now that I’m quickly to place in my two weeks’ discover. I’m not apprehensive about delivering it to be posted, however I’m apprehensive that I used to be maybe by no means meant to have it within the first place, and that I could also be in some hassle for having held onto it for thus lengthy. There’s additionally a distant — however not unimaginable — likelihood that it was a sign-on bonus, however truthfully, if it have been, I’d nonetheless don’t have any use for it.

How ought to I tactfully ask concerning the logistics of its return? My first thought was to request a guidelines of things to be despatched again, however I’m not sure if that would appear odd. This has been my first workplace job, so any recommendation is enormously appreciated.

So … you actually ought to have requested about it when it first arrived! An surprising 72-inch TV is so odd to obtain that it’s seemingly it was some form of error. (It’s not possible that it was a signing bonus; these are often cash relatively than random unannounced TVs.) I’m guessing you didn’t ask about it as a result of it’s your first skilled job and it’s actually widespread for folks of their first jobs to not communicate up in conditions the place they need to … however for future reference, in case your workplace sends you one thing you’re not anticipating and don’t know what to do with, ask them about it!

At this level all you possibly can actually do is say to your supervisor, “I used to be despatched a TV once I first began that I wasn’t ever positive what to do with. Is that one thing I ought to return, and in that case are you able to assist me make preparations for a transport firm to select it up because it’s too giant for me to move by myself?”

3. I really feel damage that I used to be omitted of a coworker’s birthday lunch

4 of us used to work collectively on the identical staff (with others who’ve taken redundancy or gone to different places). Two of us stay on the staff (me and Elaine) with new folks. The opposite two (Alex and Beatrice) have moved into different groups, however all of us nonetheless work in the identical workplace when not working from residence.

The opposite day once we have been all within the workplace, Elaine, Alex, and Beatrice went out for lunch for Alex’s birthday however didn’t invite me. I really feel damage as I take to each other with Elaine and felt I’d gotten on properly with the others. It was a non-public celebration. And another person on my staff who began after Beatrice moved on and simply earlier than Alex moved on was additionally not invited. Though equally certified, I’m a couple of grades beneath in a help function and the group will be hierarchical informally.

What’s your tackle this? And may I be expressing my damage and the way? Usually I’d have a look at arranging a lunch with them to point curiosity in being concerned however really feel too damage.

Don’t inform them you’re damage; that might point out they did one thing blameworthy, once they actually didn’t.

Typically persons are simply nearer with some coworkers than with others. Perhaps they’ve all stayed in nearer contact since your staff cut up up. Or possibly it got here up extra casually than you’re picturing (for instance, if Alex talked about it was his birthday in a message chain the place they have been already speaking, the opposite two may have stated “we should always take you out to lunch” with out it being a extra formal, deliberate factor). It could possibly be hierarchy too since they’re a couple of grades above you (hierarchy in idea ought to don’t have anything to do with who will get lunch with who, however in follow typically does).

4. Who ought to reply first?

I spotted not too long ago that in two conditions, I put the onus on another person to reply and was questioning if there may be customary etiquette.

State of affairs 1: Anne emails Brian with an issue. Brian connects Anne to (and cc:s) Carol.
State of affairs 2: Carol emails Emily with an issue and Emily responds, copying a number of folks (together with Frank and Georgia) to try to work out who can assist. Frank says Georgia would have extra data.

I’m Carol, and in scenario 1 I assumed Anne ought to attain out, however once I was in scenario 2 I assumed Georgia ought to reply! After laughing at myself for this, I’m wondering if there may be an agreed-upon customary for such issues. Ought to the individual with the reply all the time take the initiative?

Ideally sure, since they’ve been placed on discover that somebody wants data from them. However they is also busy and never know if the brand new request is time-sensitive, so there’s nothing fallacious with the one that’s searching for the data to answer first to offer extra context.

5. Can I select an alternate work schedule when my workers can’t use it in the identical method?

I work for a corporation that enables versatile work schedules — mostly both a 4/10 schedule or a 9/80 schedule, although workers have the power to create their very own as desired. There’s one catch: whereas versatile work schedules can be found to all workers, exempt workers can select any breakdown of hours they need. However non-exempt workers — due to the legal guidelines round extra time — have to decide on an alternate work schedule that doesn’t put them in extra of 40 hours/week. Notably, which means that they will’t do a 9/80 schedule as a result of it could have them working 36 hours one week and 44 hours the subsequent (as a result of the group must extra time for these further 4 hours the second week).

I’m a supervisor of a staff of about 10 of us, at various ranges. Some are exempt and a few are non-exempt. A number of of them have already got versatile work schedules in place, together with non-exempt workers (who’ve chosen schedules that work inside the 40 hour/week rule). I need to undertake a versatile work schedule for myself … however my desire is to do a 9/80, which is barely obtainable to exempt workers. As a supervisor, is it okay for me to make the most of this schedule that isn’t obtainable to all of my staff? I do know that is how I work greatest, however I fear that it’ll really feel unfair to my workers who can’t do a 9/80. How do I talk to them that I help everybody using versatile work schedules to the diploma potential (whereas acknowledging that if they’re non-exempt, I can’t change the 40 hour/week restrictions)?

Sure, you possibly can select that schedule for your self. Folks typically perceive that exempt and non-exempt jobs are ruled by totally different guidelines (a few of them in non-exempt workers’s favor — like not being anticipated to work unpaid extra time, which exempt workers typically are).

It’s not as in the event you’d be profiting from a perk that’s basically unfair or unsupportable (like if senior administration have been, I don’t know, allowed to spend the primary hour of the day on the fitness center whereas everybody else was fined for displaying up a minute late). It’s not inherently unfair or offensive that totally different jobs have totally different guidelines, when these guidelines are rooted in one thing actual just like the authorized necessities round extra time pay, which on this case would imply {that a} non-exempt worker working a 9/80 schedule would actually price the group extra money.